GOOD NEWS!!!!

I have been given the thumbs up and a green light to begin an entire new chapter in my life. I no longer have a catheter and yesterday I peed like I have not peed in years and it was wonderful. It was almost erotic. I know that sound a bit strange but when you have spent years having to hope you could pee only to drip and drizzle it is a miraculous act. I have a follow up appointment with my Urologist on the 28th of next month at which point we will discuss additional functions of my junk. Things like getting and holding an erection AKA ED and what can be done to facilitate that and what to expect as a result, the dreaded retrograde ejaculations'. But, honestly, those are the least of my concerns. Just being able to pee like a normal person, being able to actually sleep through the night are all that I wanted and expected from this. And that has been given me through these procedures even though there were times when I just wanted to toss in the towel. I have what I set out for and that is enough.

I know that at 75 I am still "in the prime of old age". But all the rest would just be icing on the cake and not something that is of major concern to me.

The love of my live these days, John, has done a few things that are cause for concern to me. When he found I had already filed my taxes he got all upset saying that he thought we could file jointly and get more money. We are not legally married and are over a thousand miles apart which IRS might find a bit suspicious in filing a joint return. Then he suddenly wants me to open something called a DCU account which he can make use of for some transactions he is, for some reason, restricted from doing. I have laid it all out on the line. I do not want financial assistance from him and I have never been anything less than honest with him in letting him know that I am poor and have nothing to offer except my love. If that is not enough, if our love is contingent on some possibly less than legal activities, then I am going to take care of myself first.

So, I suspect, I am on the brink of becoming that lovable yet lonely old man living his best life as best as he can. I will leave the door open for an explanation from him but I suspect that my days filled with long distance romance are short lived. And, if that is the case, that is alright.

I still have my Timmy, I have a couple of really close friends here that I trust and I still have my cousin and his wife. And I have those of you who have become more than just virtual friends. I have a new friend and his husband who I met during the Prostate experience who have helped me get through the worst of it. Put all that together with a heavy dose of Netflix and Prime Video, a library filled with books to read and the promise of sunny and warmer days and there is little that I want or need.

I am of the opinion and now have the ability to, if things are just not right in my live, I can just piss on it all and move forward.