Mr. Cleveland. A man of amazing good looks and fit physique that could easily own that name as his title. I am not revealing much about him out of respect for his privacy until such time that he says he wants the world to know about us. That sounds a lot more mysterious than it should. We only met online a short time ago and almost immediately began an online relationship that, at least for me, has been confusing and at times frightening. Not in some online serial killer way, but having been catfished once recently and ending up with a lot of debt because I believed everything that was said and promised. 

I am not ashamed to admit that happened. These are people who prey on the elderly who are alone and lonely, who have given up on ever being loved or held again. So, when those things suddenly disappear and that faintly remembered happiness is offered it is hard not to just grab hold and do anything necessary to protect those feelings. Even the sending of money to a stranger who says they only need it for an emergency and will pay it back soon. This is always followed by another request, and another and soon you have sent them a large sum of money and they suddenly do not answer emails or text messages.

So, having been down that road I am hesitant when a stranger professes an out of the ordinary affection toward me online. First I admit that I take a copy of their picture and do an image search which often identifies them right off the bat as a predator. Delete, block, wipe from memory. 

But, with Mr. Cleveland it was different. First there was his name. It is such a common name that I figured it had to be fake. And all his pictures were posed studio quality pictures which are often a sign of a catfisher who is taking the identity of a model. So I requested a picture, sort of a selfie, which he provided and which did not raise any red flags on an image search. And, in addition, he sent a little video clip which was made with his shirt off and he revealed that he not only said he worked out he delivered photographic proof. 

Here are a couple of screen captures from that video of Mr. Cleveland's chest. 

Now you see why I am in awe of my good fortune. I have an online and never to be satisfied relationship with a amazingly handsome South American god. And now a man with this body, and the face is equally as attractive, that has seen pictures of me, knows that I do not have two pennies to rub together, is aware that I have some health issues that present a challenge and a few that will be a permanent part of my life and understands that my erratic attitude toward him on occasion is based on my fear that he is catfishing me....but there is no meat on this fish, so why is he interested in me?

I know that there are those men who have a strong attraction toward men who are much older than they are. I know at least one who has been in three relationship during his life, all with men 50 or more years older than he is, all of whom he has outlived and mourns daily. None of whom were wealthy or very distinguished looking older gentlemen. Just ordinary old men with ordinary old men issues and lucky enough to meet him and find love in their late years that was honest and sincere.

So here I am with this amazing young man who works hard to support himself, has even offered to help be pay off my bills and get out of debt earlier (which I adamantly refused). Who has talked about saving his money to buy a house where we, yes he said we, could live and be happy together. 

What is happening here. How can this answer to a prayer be happening? Is it really happening? I have, a couple of times, tried to sabotage what is happening and he patiently waits for me to calm down and always says that I have nothing to worry about.

I am confused and happy at the same time. I am ready to pack up and move to Cleveland which would be a really stupid thing to do at this time, or any time in the foreseeable future. I have absolutely no idea what is going to happen or how any of this is going to turn out. 

I have decided to just go along for the ride. If something more serious comes of all this I will be happy. And, if nothing more happens than what has happened already, well I will not be disappointed at least.

 The only regret I would have if this falls apart is not having been held and hugged against that chest by those arms.